I wanted to keep this short and sweet, but there are a lot of things I have to say, and it will get personal, so it will be long… haha. As you can see, we’re expecting! And we’re happy, scared, excited, overwhelmed, calm and completely freaked out. This pregnancy thing is crazy! But I’m glad we’re in it, and will make it through, together.
So, here are my thoughts and our reveal in photos and a few cinemagraphs, because why not? So excited I found this shirt by the way, it’s perfect!
Ben and I do things on our own terms, when we’re ready, especially when it is huge life-changing decisions (which I strongly believe you all should do by the way). For years, so many people were bothered that we didn’t get engaged soon enough, and as soon as that happened, they started asking “when are you going to have kids??” These are not things to take lightly, or do when other people think you should. And although I always knew we would get married and start a family, I’m so glad we waited to be 100% positive and ready to take on the challenge. It’s a friggin’ big one! Luckily we have very supportive and non-judgmental families. You all have been awesome.
If you really know us, you know we both work ALL THE TIME. Ben has crazy hours, my full-time job can be insane, and I work on photo projects during most of my spare time. But we finally feel ready to pull back on some of that and make time for this next stage in our lives. I’m not sure yet where this will take me personally and in my career, but time will tell and honestly, there are some pretty big decisions I need to make in the next year or two.
Also, on a very personal note. I’ve been going back and forth on kids for a while. I’m not your “typical girl” who liked to play with dolls and loves babies. In fact, as awful as this may sound, I don’t really like babies. There, I said it. I don’t want to hold them, well, sometimes I do, and honestly, you know they’re not always that cute, lol. I don’t like drool and messes and all the other yuck that comes with it… Ben feels the same way, as probably most guys do. But we know with ours that will all change.
I was starting to worry about myself though, doubt my future mom abilities, because in my thirties I still hadn’t gotten that “urgent need to have a baby” feeling everyone talks about. And I never really did, it’s just not me. We don’t “need” a baby to fulfill our lives, they feel very full as they are. We’re happy. But when I see our future, I know there are kids in it. I absolutely love little kids, older kids and young adults. They’re great, and Ben and I together are pretty smart, artistic and talented, I guess good looking, lol, and feel we could make a pretty awesome human.
And disclaimer: I’m absolutely not judging anyone who does feel this way. Good for you! I’m stating that it was just not my experience. And since it is the norm, I was sometimes made to feel kinda bad about it.
Which brings me to our most important reason of all to have kids. The world needs more good people. Things are a mess. They have been for a while, but seem to be worse than ever in a lot of ways. But also better than ever in others. I actually often times thought it would be an awful idea to bring kids into a world like this, we don’t know what terrible things they may have to deal with or live through. But we plan to teach them well, build a smart, strong, accepting person who has empathy, doesn’t judge, thinks before they talk, makes informed decisions, helps others, loves animals and sees the best in people. So yeah, raising good humans is our goal here.
So here’s to us, our family and the hopefully bright future it holds. I plan to document this journey of course, so look forward to more of that to come!
For now, this is our life. Me trying to read and figure out as much of this as possible, as Ben plays guitar and maybe learns some lullabies :)
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